Voices of Authority

I love listening to podcasts while I work. Some of my favorites are Jocko Willink at #JockoPodcast, Mike Ritland at #MikeDrop, Marcus and Morgan Luttrell at #TeamNeverQuit, David Rutherford at #FrogLogic, Shawn Ryan at #VigilanceElite, Andy Stumpf at #ClearedHot, Karen Kilgariff and Georgia Hardstark at #MyFavoriteMurder and motivational videos by David Goggins. 

Life is hard.  Getting up every day to push my aging body into a healthy state, going to work all day, and then running around doing all the errands life has in store for me like grocery shopping, walking the dog, checking the mail, paying bills, cleaning, cooking, etc., that make my life my life – can be draining on the mind, heart, body and soul.  While I have learned a long, long, long time ago that no one is going to motivate me more than I’m going to motivate myself, I sometimes can use a little help.

I’m careful what I listen to, just like I have to be careful what I eat.  What I pour into my body, mind, heart and soul is what I am going to reap. I push hard because I want good results.  I keep going when I don’t feel like it because my desire for my goal is more than my desire to be lazy.  Believe me, I want to take the easy road. I’ve been begging for the easy road my whole life, but it doesn’t seem I’m made for the easy road.  I feel like I’m a pulpwood truck designed to carry heavy loads down pot-hole-ridden dirt roads, when I want to be a Lamborghini flying down the Autobahn. Instead I slap some pretty paint over my rough body and get to work.

I’ve chosen the podcasts I listen to for a purpose – to receive strength. These are warriors, pioneers, over-achievers, inspirers, motivators and leaders.  They are Navy SEALs, MMA fighters, Ju-Jitsu teachers, runners, comedians, professionals, survivors, poets and professionals. They don’t just talk shit – they do it. I don’t want to hear talk from someone who’s read about it, studied it, or has thoughts and ideas about something … I want to hear from people who KNOW, who have sacrificed, who have put the work in, who have paid the price – and STILL keeps fighting, never quits, never accepts the excuses that life hands to them on a daily basis. I want to learn from someone who has some authority. I don’t want to THINK about doing something - I want to overcome. I am a survivor. I am a fighter. I am warrior.  I am a woman.

So, let’s go Jocko.  Let that smooth, deep, voice of authority lead me into the wisdom and knowledge of your experience and leadership. Thank you for letting me know I’m not the only insane 4am warrior in this universe. Love Echo’s questions – keep ‘em coming. Let’s go, Mike. Keep reminding me to be real, to lay it all out there, and remember my humanity, my training, and my discipline. You’re a stone for this tumbleweed. Man, I love you. I have loved EVERY podcast I have listened from you. I hope my opinion matters in this case, because I sure as Hell know it doesn’t on your podcast.  Let’s go, Rut. Pour out your poems and your deep-rooted hope that stirs my soul. Let’s go Marcus and Morgan – keep reminding me to never give up, to never quit, and that there is life after survival.  Andy, Andy, Andy …you’re one smart cookie – keep letting me know I can’t be cleared hot and that danger is always close. Come on, Goggins – help me bear the suffering and keep running and keep standing in that mirror of accountability. Keep showing me I don’t have to be defined by this world that I can do anything I set my mind to accomplish if I’m willing to really suffer for it. Hooyah! Come on Ryan, push that vigilance, take aim at the target, and keep true.  Come on Karen and Georgia, make me laugh and do it while reminding me the world is full of dangerous people, and show me how strong, smart, opinionated, foul-mouthed woman can succeed. Oh, and the lessons on murder – well, who knows if those will come in handy someday.

All these people are beautiful inspirations to me. Each of them have inspired me and motivated me to keep going, and they do it every day.  They are filling my heart and my mind with the tools and weapons I need to keep pushing to succeed, and I appreciate the hell out of them. They are my voices of authority. 

God is my ultimate authority, but I believe these are his modern-day prophets.  They LIVE his Word in truth and deed.  They’re not preachers or evangelists knocking on your doors and trying to push a belief on you. They’re real people, real heroes, and real examples. I don’t want to just hear or read a principle, I want to see it in action, I want to see it applied, I want to see the results it produces, and I love what these men and women are producing. 

I never listened to podcasts before, but now I don’t want to go through my day without them. Check these guys out. I promise you won’t be sorry.

Till next time,

~T.L. Gray

Podcast Links:

My Favorite Murder - https://www.myfavoritemurder.com/

Jocko Podcast - http://jockopodcast.com/

Mike Drop - https://mikeritland.com/mike-drop-podcast/

Vigilance Elite - https://www.vigilanceelite.com/

Team Never Quit - https://teamneverquit.com/podcast/

Cleared Hot - https://www.clearedhotpodcast.com/

David Goggins - https://youtu.be/-vY1cgnQQq0

The Stories We Tell

Last week I listened to a podcast on #MikeDrop; Navy SEAL Mike Ritland’s show, a podcast I’ve grown to love to listen to while I’m working.  In this episode, Ritland interviewed a woman named Emily Joy “GunbunnyActual” Hill. This badass was an Army Apache helicopter pilot and is as tough and vulgar as any sailor I’ve ever heard. At first I was a little reluctant to listen to the podcast, especially when I saw it was 4 hours long.  Not because it was with a woman, but because it wasn’t about a SEAL.  I’m in SEAL mode at the moment, learning, studying, listening, and being amazed at this branch of our Armed Special Forces. However, the Army will always hold a special place in my heart, and I wanted to see the insights this woman had to offer. I wanted to know what this Navy SEAL found so interesting about her. I was not disappointed.

Ms. Joy, who I’ll refer to as Gunbunny, came out of the gate flying, tossing around f-bombs like beaded necklaces in a Mardi-Gras parade. It sounded like she was fighting a head cold, sniffling into a napkin or two, or three, but she was also full of confidence and blunt honesty.  That got my attention right away.  I hate fake politeness.  It didn’t take long before she dropped the first of many, many hard subjects and truths into our laps when she started talking about being sexually molested by a family member when she was a young adult.

I struggled with wanting to turn the podcast off, or continue to listen. I have a hard time with victims, because victims often don’t face their shit. They lay blame, make excuses, and break beneath shame and low self-esteem and become weak and needy. I suppose it’s understandable … just not by me. It’s actually one of my triggers and I get angry around victims. I want to scream at them to suck it up, shut the fuck up, pull up their big girl britches, and fight for themselves – don’t let the world tell them they’re a victim; become a survivor, which only makes me a bully to already weak people. So, I tune it out, turn it off, or walk away. But, Gunbunny sounded strong and confident, so I stuck it out a little longer and I’m glad I did.  She has a terrible, sad, amazing and strong story to tell.  Her nerves are still raw, her voice quivered a time or two, and she struggled between what she wanted to say and what she thought was appropriate to say, but said what was in her heart anyway. So, I give her props. I became more impressed with her as the podcast went on – and 4 hours passed quickly.

But, she wasn’t the only inspiration during that podcast, Mike Ritland did an amazing job being kind, thoughtful, and respectful during the broadcast.  He didn’t TREAT her as a victim, he didn’t placate to her sensibilities or feelings, and he didn’t avoid the hard topic with kid gloves.  He wasn’t an asshole. I could tell at moments from the tenor of his voice that he struggled with some of the things she was telling him. A listener could tell he was hearing them for the first time. I could only imagine that warrior protector inside of him wanting to burst out and slay the world, defend the girl, and make things right struggle like Hell inside him. Yet, he kept his cool, and tackled some hard issues like rape, abuse, adoption, chauvinistic assholes, military demands and failures, women’s roles in special forces, death, struggles with identity and finding purpose AFTER service, etc. 

This isn’t a podcast for everyone, but it’s one I wish everyone could hear.  I admire Gunbunny for her courage to tell her story, and I hope she continues to tell it even more, as often as she can. I don’t personally know her. She could be an asshole, or she could be a saint.  She’s human like the rest of us and had to deal with some hard shit.  I don’t know how her tomorrow’s are going to be, but I’m hoping she finds that purpose she’s seeking and with it a little peace.

If you’ve got the guts, check out the podcast. If you do, get some tissues. 

https://youtu.be/RacEiK7cFgs

Till next time,

~T.L. Gray