In light of the recent news reports, political pundits,
protest riots, looting, and argumentative angst on both sides of the issue
concerning the fatal shooting in Ferguson, I’ve tried to remain quiet and not
respond emotionally. I’ve listened to
the various arguments and have tried to see things from all perspectives. I
have to say I don’t get most of them – on either side of the issue. I’m so sick of all the race baiting and
bashing in this world. We are human beings – all of us, yet we sometimes act
worse than the most rabid of animals.
I’ve been so frustrated without realizing why I’ve been
frustrated. I believe it’s due to the
fact I’ve been unable to verbally express what’s been rolling around inside my
mind and heart, because honestly I felt like it didn’t matter anyway and there
was really no one that I could share my true thoughts and feelings. Not because I don’t have anyone to listen,
but I feel there are very few who CAN listen – hear me without bias, without
prejudice, without judgment, without a PC or anti-PC or victim’s mentality who
would try and stuff me into one of their preconceived boxes. I’ll either be labeled a racist or fascist –
instead of a rationalist.
There really isn’t such a thing as a rational debate anymore
– there’s a contest to see who can shout the loudest, who can incite the more
powerful emotional response, and who is right or wrong. It’s not about the issues anymore – because
everyone is now a victim, everyone is now more concerned with being heard and
being right than being reasonable. I honestly gave up the hope of hearing or witnessing a
rational debate until a friend of mine shared his frustrations with me this
morning. I feel honored and privileged
he shared his wise thoughts with me – because his words freed me. He was able to verbalize what I could only
feel for so long.
“Claiming victory over a debate is wrong on so many
levels. There are no winners or
losers. It’s an exchange of ideas. That’s the bottom line.” ~ Sergeant T. Emilio
Solano “If we’re going to outrage about something, it should never be
one-sided. We should focus on the act
and the bottom line, not the reasons.
Murder is murder. If a black guy
shoots a white guy or vice versa, it should not matter to the level of
outrage. It’s a man killing a man.”
I couldn’t agree more. I honestly feel that when we focus on
the race of the victim or perpetrator that is the moment we dismiss the
humanity and all rationalization.
Responses from that moment forward become not about the crime/act, but
about the skin.
Sergeant Solano continues, “Why are we so infatuated with
the reasons? Does it really matter? A crime was committed. Harm was done. Does it matter who or why? Reason should only matter on self-defense
cases. That’s it. A community of poor uneducated people (the
majority are) should not care if a white cop shoots a black dude. Do we revolt when a black man shoots a white
man in a trailer park? I’m tired when
any minority cries out about how bad they have it, or how underprivileged they
are. If you want to succeed - go to
school and make a better life for yourself.”
Again, I couldn’t agree more. My friend is a great example. He is man of mixed races, born in the
Dominican Republic and not of privilege, yet has worked hard to make something
of himself. He doesn’t drink, doesn’t do
drugs, and takes pride in all he sets himself to do – working with excellent
ethics for nearly 15 years in the Army. He's been in combat, is a leader, a teacher, a
role model, and my admiration and respect for him is intangible. The way his subordinates respect him is not something given or granted, but earned. It’s also something very lacking in pop
culture today.
I made the response to him, “We live in a PC world where
everyone is a victim. You’re of a
different mindset. You see individuality
and personal responsibility, and that, my friend, puts you into another
minority.”
He responded, “In nature, victims get eaten. In humanity, those who want to play the
victim and not strive to change should be purged. We don’t need their sorryness
(I know… it’s not a real word) around the rest of us who strive every day. Nobody really cares if you’ve been oppressed,
enslaved, or abused. Grow up, become
stronger, educate yourself, and work hard.
We all have the same opportunities.
Nobody cares about your sorrows.”
If we all look into our own closets, we ALL have been
victimized in some way. We have ALL felt
and experienced some form of oppression, enslavement, or abuse. EVERY ONE of us (black, white, rich, poor and
every box we’ve created between). These
experiences all lend to reasons for how we react, but they’re not excuses. There are really no excuses for repaying one
bad deed with another. Our response is
truly what separates victims from survivors - from those who fail and those who
overcome.
Let’s be human beings, love one another as humans, and care
for one another as humans. Let us
examine all things with rational debate – remove the race, the hate, the
prejudice, the boxes, and the victimization.
Let’s talk to each other, not at each other.
I love and admire my friend very much. He’s not bad to look at either, but it’s his mind for rational debate that makes him truly beautiful.
Till next time
~T.L. Gray
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