We live in an age where we want something for nothing. Where is the sacrifice? Where is the sweat and tears? Where is the fear of failure? Where is the desire to try?
We want love, devotion, faithfulness, loyalty, and respect, but we don't want to give those things first. We want to enjoy the fruits of our labor but only give a half-assed effort for those fruits. If we fail there are always those to enable us and bail us out of our responsibilities. We want to be loved, but only love with the smallest part of our hearts in fear of gettimg hurt.
We are asshole, to ourselves, to the people in our lives, our family, our friends, our coworkers, and society in general. We then pass that asshole-disease onto the next generation.
Where is truth. Where is real compassion. Where is real love, real devotion, real passion, real sacrifice, real spirit of excellence?
I will not wait to receive these things to give them. I don't trust the world or anyone in it to step up. I've been disappointed too many times to hope. I do believe there are those out there that do give their best, that do live with a spirit of excellence and with honor. If I'm capable, so are others. I know I may never meet them. I do it for me. I do it to be proud of thr woman I am; the woman I choose to be. I treat the world and the people in my life the way I would want to be treated.
Choosing to live this way will win no popularity contests, in fact, I often lose family, lovers, and 'friends' that feel intimidated or can't handle the truth, or get butt-hurt when they're called on their shit or they want enabled or receive lame excuses. I won't do that. I can live with mistakes, bad decisions, and poor choices ...but I won't just remain silent as they're being made. As a friend, out of,reapect, I'll speak truth, just as I would want to be given the truth. If it hurts, deal with it, face it, and be responsible to correct it. If you need help ...I'll give my best to help. Want to hate me and be an asshole because you're butt-hurt ..,I don't want family, lovers, or friends like that and will walk away without blinking. This is my life and I've had enough vampires suck the life out of me too many times.
If you're an asshole vampire, you will remain an asshole vampire until you can grow up and face the truth. If you're still holding onto anger and unforgiveness, and its affecting your life ...get the fuck over it. Its only hurting you. If thats the excuse for your asshole behavior, you're just an asshole.
Listen to how you would want to be listened to ...
Forgive the way you would want to be forgiven ...
Speak the way you would want to spoken to ...
Love the way you would want to be loved ....
Be kind, be honest, be diligent, be faithful, be loyal, be courteous, be thoughtful, be giving, and hold your head high in the midst of persecution. You will not have to defend your actions, because your character - the actions taken over time - will reveal your true characters. When the vampires rise and try to attack that character, they will fail ... But only if its real and not a half-assed laziness, or an attitude of something for nothing.
It's up to us who we are ... Not our parentage, not our childhood, not our experiences, not all the horrible things that have happened to us, not our financial status, not our educational level, not our titles, or accomplishments. Not ANYTHING that has happened TO us by others, but in how,we respond and what we do on a daily basis from the smallest thing to the biggest. We are either men and women of character or assholes. I do me. You don't have to like me. I've learned to love the woman I have become and like me enough.
Till next time,
~T.L. Gray
