Think Before You PM

Instead of my typical blog post this morning, I’ve decided to make a plea.  This is something that’s been bothering me for some time now, but I’ve hesitated saying anything – because I don’t want to upset, hurt, or anger anyone.  There’s this other part of me on the inside screaming, “You just broke out of a box where you were told what to think, what to believe, how to dress, how to act, how to talk, and almost on a daily basis reminded to watch what you do and say because others are watching you.  God forbid I should cause another to stumble.”  That was a heavy burden to carry.  I refuse to ever carry it again.

I will start by saying - I am responsible for what I do and say.  I will one day give an account for ME.  I am NOT however responsible for YOUR response, YOUR behavior, YOUR thoughts, YOUR actions, or for YOUR stumble.  YOU are.

Now that that’s out of the way, let me begin.

YES, I’m single.  YES, I’m a natural flirt.  I flirt with everyone, men and women.  I’m a witty person.  Sometimes I hear or see something and a corresponding phrase will pop into my head.  Sometimes that response is funny, sometimes serious, sometimes witty, sometimes stupid as hell, sometimes it’s brilliant, and sometimes a little perverted.  I have no filter.  Those who know me, know I ALWAYS speak my mind.  That’s not to say my mind always has the appropriate or perfect answer.  On the contrary – it’s usually just as messed up and jumbled as I am.  However, it’s always the truth and always authentic - to me.

Having said that, being single, cute, and naturally flirtatious has led to a few complications.  One of those complications – receiving very inappropriate PM’s.

I apologize if I’ve given the impression that I would enjoy receiving those types of correspondences.  I don’t.  Don’t get me wrong, I love when people are just as open and  flirtatious as I am.  By all means… flirt.  But, there IS a difference between being fun and flirty and being an inappropriate pervert.

I’m not a party girl. I’m not looking for a hookup.  I will NEVER be the ‘other’ woman.  (BTW – tell your wives and your girlfriends they can quit messaging me too.  I’m not responsible for your behavior. ) I respect relationships.  If you have a girlfriend or a wife, you have NO business sending me a PM  for any reason, except perhaps on writing related business. Quit sending me your phone numbers or inappropriate pictures.  I will never call and am not impressed.  NO, I will not send you a naked picture. I don’t take those kinds of pictures and I’ll never send one even if I do.  Grow up.  You want to see a naked woman (other than your wives/girlfriends), they’ve got magazines and websites for that.

My Facebook is not a dating site.  My children and family are on here.  My closest friends are on here too.  I also have friends, work colleagues, and fans here too.  Don’t get me wrong.  I am the SAME on Facebook as I am in person.  My family and friends know who I am, they know I’m flirtatious, they know I’m a little batty, funny, have a serious side, can get confrontational on a dime, and passionate about everything I do.  I don’t censor what I say or do online. I’ve learned to be very open and honest about who I am.  But that’s not a license for YOU to be inappropriate with me or disrespect me.

If you’re interested in being my friend, in dating, in getting to know me better, then interact with me in public until we reach a point in our interaction to take things on a more private level.  People, it’s just like if we met in person.  Interact with me the same way you would if I were standing right in front of you.  Just because you’re behind a computer screen doesn’t mean you skip right to the bedroom.  Also, if you’re in a ‘situation’ where public interaction with me will cause ‘problems’… that’s YOUR problem, not mine. If you interact with me, expect it to be public until we enter into an actual relationship – then I will keep your privacy.  I have several friends who are just private people, and I respect their privacy.  That’s a different ballgame.

Think before you PM me.  If you’re interested in me, get to know me.  I’m an opened book.  Have a little bit of understanding and respect.  I just came out of a 20 year marriage.  My heart has been shredded and I’m doing my best to put it back together.  My life has been turned upside down, and I’m doing all I can to set it upright and move into a brighter direction.  I’ve had some hit and misses on the dating front, but this whole dating thing is a new beast for me. Have patience as I find my way.  But don’t misunderstand my situation.  I’m not a desperate little girl seeking the attention and admiration from just anybody.  I’m a beautiful, confident, independent, strong as hell grown woman, kicking life’s ass. I know what I want and don’t want, and I don’t compromise.  I seek crowns, not gum unworthy to stick to the bottom of my shoes.  I’ve tried to be nice and polite, but my middle  finger has no problem hitting the ‘unfriend’ button.

Till next time,

~Frustrated with Perverts