Thursday, May 24, 2012

Ignorance is Bliss

My  baby is officially a Senior in high school now.  WHAT???  When in Hades did that happen?  It was just yesterday she was causing trouble in middle school.  These last few weeks have left me in the twilight zone.

My little girl (that's what she'll always be to me.  Have you seen that Subaru commercial where the dad is giving his 16-year old daughter driving and safety advice through the window of the car, but all he see's is a little 6-year old???? - well, that's how it is for me.) keeps reminding me that her 18th birthday is coming up.  I hear those words with my ears, but they don't compute like they should, because my inner ear hears "13" - the "3" being only half of the reflected "8". Everybody keeps telling me I have to let her grow up.  What I want is for somebody to SHOW me that law, and I won't accept ink and paper.  It has to be carved in stone by the finger of God.   I am in absolutely NO hurry for her to grow up.  She's doing just fine, just the way she is. 

Growing up is going to happen.  I know that. But, I don't have to rush it along.  I pushed too hard and too fast with my oldest daughter (23), and there's nothing I wouldn't give to grant her an opportunity to be a kid again.  There are some things I would definitely do differently.  But my time-travel superpower doesn't always work when I want it to.    My twenty-one year old son, doesn't seem to be in too big a hurry to grow up, but it's slipping up on him anyway.  One day I see a hungry, lazy, game-playing teenager, and the next I see a responsible, faithful, and mature man.  It goes back and forth between the two.  But, my baby ...I just refuse to think too much about it.  When it finally happens, I'll be forced to accept it, but until it does - leave me in peace, and let me enjoy what little time I have left with her still needing me.  Quit reminding me every two seconds that she's growing up.  Let me imagine her just a little bit longer, clinging to what remains of her childhood. 

Here's a little bit of statics for you:  You are an infant for only two years.  You are a child for only ten years.  You are a teenager for only seven years.  THEN you're an adult for the rest of your life.  Don't be in too big a hurry to become, or push someone else into becoming, an adult.  We've only got 19 years, on average only 5%, of our whole life to be in this youthful stage. So if my brain computes 13 instead of 18 - let it. In this instance - ignorance is bliss.

Now, I've got to get to work and see how much editing I can squeeze in before she wakes up and starts interrupting me - wanting or needing something, or just plain ol' bored and I'm the distraction.  (No, I'm not bipolar - but I sometimes play one in print.)

Till next time,
~T.L. Gray

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